Woman's Quick Tip: How Not To Pick Up A Lady


This past weekend I was in Chicago, and while waiting in line for the bathroom at a local dive in Lakeview, I made friends with the girl in front of me. We chatted for awhile, and she said "sorry, I have to get back up front, this guy who bought me a drink is super cute and a PGA golfer." It took a minute to process, but I put on a fake smile and responded with a "No way! I love golf! Can I meet him too?"

We walked over to the bar, and this "gentleman" was wearing a backwards Callaway hat and polo shirt with the collar popped, clearly trying to send the image of "Pro Golfer" to all the ladies at the bar. I approached him and said "So, my new friend tells me you're a professional golfer" I asked, "I am" he responded, "Brent Johnson" and offered to buy me a drink.

I tried my hardest not to laugh, and asked "If you're a PGA golfer, why aren't you at The Olympic Club right now?" His face fell before I continued with "Oh, and Brent Johnson is a goalie for the Pens, but nice try."

Moral of the story: Lying to pick up girls: Never Bro Council, Approved.

Oh, and congratulations to Dustin Johnson who was actually playing in that tournament.

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Written By Kristin


Kristin is a law school graduate, former college swimmer, and in a past job, worked on the launch of KFC's Double Down. You're welcome, America.