Review: Mangroomer Biz Wipes (Baby Wipes For Men)

Mangroomer Biz Wipes Review

This has been one of the hardest and strangest articles I have been asked to write, so let me start from the beginning:

One of the perks of this job is that occasionally companies send us things to try out, and this was one of those occasions. I received a text from Ray saying "Hey, Mangroomer called and wants to send us some new stuff to try out and I told them to send it you." I thought to myself, great, I get a razor or shaver to try out. You know, something man-like. I was excited to see what this new and exciting product was, but about a week went by without a package. I was in the process of sending a text to Ray and ask if he had my correct address when I saw that there was an odd shaped package at home waiting for me. I immediately thought, "well this is a strange box for a new shaver." So I got Ray on the phone as I opened the package, and what he heard was laughter. Mangroomer had sent us Biz Wipes.

Yes Biz Wipes, an executive scent, flush-able moist wipe engineered for men. First, what exactly is an executive scent? I don't ever see this when I am dragged through a Yankee Candle store, and most executives I know smell of corruption and greed. Second, just what is "engineered for men?" How is a moist wipe for men different from any other?

The back of the package reads:

Biz Wipes by Mangroomer are made to keep you fresh and clean all day long. Specifically formulated for men, use Biz Wipes in addition to toilet paper to effectively clean and eliminate any unwanted residue. Biz Wipes are also great for freshening up the male intimate area after a long day at work or after a workout. Maintain yourself with Biz Wipes.

I took a few days and stared at the package baffled as to why this was needed. So I set upon a quest to ask around about the product, and had some very odd conversations with both male and female friends about the Biz Wipes. I thought that maybe it was just me that was confused by the product, but what I found is that it wasn't just me. Everyone I asked had the same response when questioned if they would use it; "wait - you mean they are baby wipes?" Surprisingly, not one person I polled would use adult baby wipes. Shocking, I know. And as far as the "after the gym" concept; again, I say what? I am pretty sure all of my health classes said you should dry that area and not continue to wet it down and invite bacterial growth and fungal infections. Remember kids, nothing says "stay away from me" quite like a bad case of jock itch.

I asked my female friends this question; if you went to a new guys house for the first time and saw this in his bathroom, what would you think? The overwhelming response was that they would leave if they saw a guy had baby wipes. For some reason, that was weird to them. Again, shocking. My next question was to ask whether they would prefer their new guy to have Biz Wipes or a replica light-saber. Once again, Biz Wipes came out behind as the response went in favor of seeing light-sabers in the guys house over "baby wipes."

I have enjoyed Mangroomer's products like their body hair shaver in the past, and I will probably love some of their future innovations. Unfortunately, Biz Wipes are just not something I can get pun intended.

Mangroomer Bizwipes: Yes They're A Real Thing

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Written By Pat


Pat is our resident comic book guy, news archiver, and is occasionally offensive. We apologize in advance.

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